When conflicts arise.

A pair of white-tailed deer bucks - conflict without injury.

John Lenon's idea of a utopian society is laudable, but not possible.  The concept assumes that people would master their needs and desires for resources; human nature at its core is about the acquisition of them.  Nature, in fact, is exactly the same.  Any desirable resource limited in quantity will spark conflict.  Food, mates, space, nesting sites, hierarchy, and so on will always be needed and therefore something to be fought over, human or otherwise.

The question then becomes, "How to manage conflict" rather than, "How to avoid it."  At its core is the concept of civility, and civility is based on respect.  Manners are important, of course, but there are lots of well-mannered jerks about.  The crux must be on respect for humanity, right down to the unit of an individual.  We can be benevolent towards our fellow man in general, but when we don't get along with our neighbour, something is amiss.

Respect has to be a practical thing with real-world actions.  Its anthesis falls into the aphorism, "Do as I say, not as I do."  Goodwill towards men should not be a once-a-year event, rather it should be the basis for our choices every day, for everyone.  This does not mean no conflicts though, because that in itself is unrealistic.  Resources, goals, ambitions, and desires will always exist, especially in a world pushing towards a population of eight billion on the verge of a global warming catastrophe.  The key is respect.

I used the photo I took of a pair of tussling white-tailed deer.  They use what they have to establish dominance in a bid for territory and breeding rights.  The key though is that no one gets hurt.  Our skill set includes cognitive reasoning and communication.  If we use these in a respectful way, with the desire to manage a conflict towards an end everybody can live with, we all win.  I am not perfect at this, but it is a model which befits the objective.  Love your neighbour as yourself.  Gosh, where have I heard that before?